Words of the Year, Quarterly Check In

First Quarter of 2023

Family, Health, Self-care, Strength

These are the words I saw three months ago when I looked at this:

Is it me, or do all of my “chosen” words feed into each other?

Health.

Let’s start here since it was the first of these words that popped into my mind when I started journaling my check in.

An 80something year old personal training client once told me, “When you have your health, you have everything.” I was in my twenties at the time, and I knew on an intellectual level what he meant. I mean, I was a personal trainer, after all. But now, a couple of decades later, I understand those words on a whole new level.

I’m not just older, I’m an older mom of a young child. My son is freshly five. So, health. I need to be healthy to be able to play with him and give him, and model for him, a healthy and active lifestyle. I need to be healthy to give myself the best chance to live to a ripe old age so I can be here for his milestone moments in life, and all the days in between. I need to be healthy to be able to take care of him, as he brings home every illness that is going around his preschool every other week. Literally. Every. Other. Week.

To that end, I exercise regularly and eat a healthy balance of foods. The second of these is tough for me. I’m a bit of an all or nothing person and have felt good, and looked better (in my opinion), on a mostly protein and veggie eating regimen. I’ve also enjoyed, and have been advised by a doctor, to do intermittent fasting.

But I don’t want any of this for him. So, against all my instincts for myself, I’m finding, and modeling balance with food. My new motto for myself:  If it doesn’t spike my blood sugar, it’s okay. Getting smart with food combos is also helpful. Eating breakfast and dinner with Asher are two of my favorite parts of the day, so here we are.

Self-care.

Yes, exercise and eating healthfully are both self-care, but in my mind the mess of words above (I know, personification) defines self-care as something just for me.

Reading. For years I had been grumbling about not having enough time to read for pleasure. I now realize that carving out time was, and is, always a choice. So, on school nights, after Asher goes to bed, I get in bed and read before I go to sleep. It means I’m not watching the latest thing that everyone is talking about, but it also means that I’m sleeping more and sleeping better. And, my vocabulary grows and shrinks in proportion with how much I read. Get ready for some SAT words in the coming months. On weekend evenings I am choosing one to two shows to stream. (Currently, Ted Lasso and Shrinking) I stay up later and make an occasion of it. I’m not in a ‘going out’ place in my life, so this works.

I recently bought myself a Paper White to read in bed. I live in a Los Angeles bungalow and am being overrun with books and Legos. The books, I can do something about. To save space (also a form of self-care) I am now only buying hard copies of books that I fall in love with and really cannot see living without being able to pluck from a bookshelf and flip through. And there really is something both fun and soothing about reading in bed with no lights on.

Yoga. I have not always been a fan. They say that every seven years your tastes change. Maybe that’s what’s happening because now I love it. I have worked twenty minutes of yoga into my morning routine, using the Down Dog app. I’ve tried others, but this one lets me adjust my level, the pace, the background sound, the voice of the instructor, the type of yoga, and the specific length of time of the practice and of the Savasana. I’ll do it for a longer period if I can, but I find that twenty minutes is enough to make me a calmer, happier, and more reasonable human throughout the day.

Family.

Date nights. Yes, this involves two of the three people in our family, but I think that connected parents = happy kid. Asher definitely feels and feeds off our vibes, and a date once a week (realistically ends up being a couple times a month) goes a long way in helping us vibe on a higher level.

No socials or computer on weekends. Now that Asher is in preschool until 3:15, and our bedtimes are fairly early, weekend hours are precious. My kiddo deserves for me to be present. I deserve for me to be present.

Sunday Supper. I’m starting to add a big family dinner to round out our week. It lasts a couple of hours and includes storytelling, mad libs, and dance breaks. Plus, it provides me with leftovers to mix into a couple of meals to start the next week with.

Strength.

This word initially scared me. I immediately wondered what horrible things would I need to be strong for? Then my dear friend, Nancy, advised me not to panic and to look up the definition(s) of the word.

There are many:

-       The quality of being strong; bodily or muscular power.

-       Mental power, force, or vigor

-       Moral power, firmness, or courage   

Okay, these definitions are not scary. I can live with these! But wait, there’s more!

I kept reading the definitions and… hold the phone!

I choose these:

-       Vigor of action, language, feeling, etc.

-       Something or someone that gives one strength or is a source of power or encouragement; sustenance

These are the definitions of strength I want to embody.

Being strong in my convictions and providing strength and encouragement for others are two focuses I’m taking into this next quarter.

By the way, if you haven’t chosen words for 2023, it isn’t too late! And if you use the jumble of words above to do so, let me know what words jump out at you!

Next check in is in three months!

XoJo